I Missed You And Pictures

I missed a day!!! I wanted to miss today too, but that's how I get into a funk and stop doing anything constructive. I haven't ran in a couple of weeks and it will take an army of drill sergeants to get me in my running shoes tomorrow.

I promised pictures and they are here!! I hope you have enjoyed following me around San Francisco and New York. It's been a fantastic journey that I never want to experience again.

Ever since I was a kid, I couldn't be away from home for more than a couple days without wanting to sob on the front porch and call my mom. I still haven't grown out of it. When we got back from Cali, I had a great day with my kids eating fried foods, shopping at the dollar store and cuddling. I wanted to stay home and cancel our trip to NYC. I  wanted coffee out of my own mugs, to drive my kids to school and to sleep in my own bed. I admit that I wasn't very excited to leave. We had planned these trips months ago and it seemed plausible to be away for a week, home for two days and gone for another six days. On our way to the airport to embark on our NYC trip,  homesickness punched me in the fucking gut and I felt like crying when we left our sleepy faced little monkeys in grandma's car. I wanted to grab the door handle and refuse to go. I was sick of security screenings, sitting next to strangers, restaurant food, tourist prices and staying busy so I could forget how homesick I really was.

We had a fun trip and I am so glad we were there to celebrate with our friends, but it was a lesson learned about two trips in a row. Never again. We are home for six weeks and off on another adventure with the kids at the end of May. While it is a hell of a lot more work to travel with kids, it makes me feel more at home when I wake up to little smiling faces and stomping feet next to my bed. It beats room service any day of the week.

We spent an entire day walking Central Park and I was shocked to find a waterfall in the middle of this huge city. After taking a landscape architecture class last year, it was amazing to see what kind of creative talent it took to create this sanctuary in the middle of chaos. There was a reservoir, a pond, gardens, a castle and beautiful foliage around every turn. This was my favorite day in New York.

My hubby is a huge Yankees fan and has been since he was a little tyke. His dream came true this week when he was able to see a game at Yankee Stadium in NYC. To watch someone you love get giddy about crossing something off their bucket list  is pretty heartwarming. Even for a hard ass like me. It got even sweeter when he realized where our tickets were, row 5 from the field. I don't think there was one minute that entire night that he wasn't smiling.

Having friends who live in the city you visit is a blessing, pure and simple. We spent the afternoon with a friend I had met when I worked at Starbucks and she pointed us in a very sweet direction. There was a little bakery with even littler cupcakes and they came in all sorts of yummy flavors. They were the size of a fucking ping pong ball. Adorable!! We bought a dozen and as you can see they barely lasted long enough for a quick pic. Make friends and tell them to move to cool places so you can come visit and take advantage of their local status. Thanks, Jackie. :)

I would also like to give a shout out to my friends Scott and Brent who were married this weekend in the most beautiful ceremony I have ever attended. I did not get permission to post pics so you will just have to use your imagination. It confirmed what I have believed for most of my life, there is not just one way to love. Their commitment and love for one another is breathtaking. I would like to vote for them to be the poster kids for why gay marriage is marriage and should be legally accepted as such. Love is love, bitches.

NYC Tough

I think I am cursed when it comes to posting pics on here. For the second trip in a row I am having issues accessing my photos and allowing you to share in the fun of my city experience. I hope my writing can keep your attention long enough for you to forget about the visual angle. I promise to load those sons of bitches as soon as I get a quality Internet connection. The Starbucks below our hotel, like every fucking place in the city, is packed with freeloading assholes like me who want fast and free Internet. I contemplated confronting the lady who had clearly set up her 'office' at 6 am today. She was squeezing every last cent out of that $2 coffee she bought 10 hours ago. I am not tough enough for a coffee shop fight in NYC.

My husband, and others who know me well, have mentioned how well I fit into city life. It could be my mouth or my natural "Fuck Off" face. People look at me from across the room and immediately think I hate them. I rarely get approached by panhandlers and when I do they are quick to beeline after my abrupt NO. During my last trip to NYC, I could see what my friends and family were saying. I could hail a cab in 30 seconds flat, push through crowds like a champ and navigate the subway like a local. Could I possibly be tough enough to live in a big city? The answer is no. This trip has made it perfectly clear that I am a suburban mom with only enough sass to survive in my neck of the woods.

While walking back to our hotel on the upper west side of Manhattan, I was approached by a strung out street walker who asked me if she could ask me a question. (You just did.) I loudly told her I had no money for her and she got upset. "That's not my question" she yelled. I kept walking and my husband, who was a few feet behind me, was approached by her at which point she pretended to need the time. She then pulled out a cell phone and called someone. The story in my head went something like this: strung out hooker calls pimp who is walking toward me, pimp proceeds to accost me while she is behind me, I am cornered and taken advantage of. Small town girl gets mugged in NYC by pimp and meth head. The end. My heart was pounding and I sprinted to my hotel, leaving my husband to fend for himself. If that's not tough, I don't know what is.

Today I was once again slapped in the face by reality while taking a solo trip on the subway. I was standing just inside the door making my way to the middle when a large man ran through the door, tackling a smaller gentleman who had just stepped on the train. The big asshole proceeded to push the gentleman across the train and into a metal pole. He was flailing and screaming for him to get out of his fucking way, asking him if he was stupid or what. My blood pressure skyrocketed so quickly, I thought I may pass out. There was yelling from other passengers and absolutely no where for me to move. I was in the middle of the action and I wanted to shit in my new black leggings. I kept breathing and made a plan, it went something like this: they start pushing, I jump over the legs of this guy to my left, I pull out something dangerous from my purse (cell phone, granola bar, floral wallet, tampon) and wield it in order to save myself. Now that's some tough business. Who isn't intimidated by a short chick swinging a tampon around?

I am not tough enough for NYC. I am barely tough enough to visit NYC without having my heart explode or meeting up with someones pimp. This city business is not for me and I am old enough to be okay with that. The jokes about living in suburbia are endless and there have been times I felt guilty for living in a safe, quiet neighborhood while all the cool kids were bar hopping and using public transportation. No more. I'm a suburban housewife and proud of it. It keeps me in clean underwear and off blood pressure medication.