Fruit Pizza And My Food OCD

Lucky Day!!! I'm sharing with you a recipe for one of my favorite desserts for summer, Fruit Pizza. My mom made this a lot while we were growing up and she updated it this week when she made single serving cookies with the same yummy goodies on top. Whichever way you choose to prepare it, this makes for a delicious, light dessert when the weather is blistery.

Fruit Pizza

1 roll of sugar cookie dough
1 container of Cool Whip (thawed)
1 8 oz. package of cream cheese (softened)
A variety of your favorite fruits (Strawberries, blueberries, kiwi and oranges are fan faves at our house)

Use a cookie sheet and flatten out the roll of cookie dough to make the crust for your pizza. Bake according to package directions. I have found that the crust is better when it is under cooked, so I take it out when the edges are toasty looking. That will create a soft and delicious crust.
While that's baking, mix the Cool Whip and cream cheese until smooth and cut up your fruit. When you crust is baked let it cool, I get impatient and place it in the freezer for 10-15 minutes. Now you are ready to put it all together!! Spread your sauce evenly over your crust and start layering your fruit. I like to put mine in rows but feel free to throw it on willy nilly. You can eat it now or refrigerate for a couple hours, personally I can't wait so half of it is gone by now. Enjoy!!

Why I Don't Eat Your Food

While people I love make some delicious treats, I have a strange affliction to eating crap from other people's house. There is a short list of homes that I eat food from and a longer list of homes that will never make the cut. Christmas is an especially challenging time of year for enhancing the relationships I have with my neighbors. I throw a lot of strange looking, odd smelling, and questionable food items in my trash can. My problem lies in not knowing how these items have been prepared and how clean any particular kitchen is. I have issues and while I am making food, I wash my hands approximately 5,000 times and wipe off my counters between each step. Thankfully, I have never worked in a restaurant or I would probably give up eating all together.

I grew up with grandparents who believed in hand washing above all else. If you washed before dinner and happened to shove your brother into a wall on your way to the dinner table, you best believe you are washing again.  My grandfather refused to eat food made by anyone other than my grandma and I thought it was bizarre that they rarely ate at restaurants. After finding hair and crusty remnants of food delivered to me by wait staff, I can now understand his hesitation. Some people don't take the care necessary in food preparation and the older I get, the queasier it makes me. I have an uncle who eats his sandwiches with his hand carefully wrapped in the sandwich baggie, as not to have his own hand touch the sandwich. Weird? I say no. Hands are nasty little buggers that have a tendency to pick up all the germs, sneeze particles and feces that strangers have chosen to leave on door handles. I have contemplated rubber gloves during many food excursions.

I am also known to have massive panic attacks when having people over for meals because I have nightmares about someone contracting a food borne illness from my macaroni salad or chicken wings. I wash, cook, and refrigerate like a Nazi and require hand washing to anyone entering the kitchen. Need a glass of water? Wash your fucking hands. Want to grab a fork? Wash that shit, now. I assume most people don't have issues like this, which is why I can't eat that loaf of banana bread you so lovingly made and sent over with your adorable 5 year old. The sweaty film from the plastic wrap is as concerning to me as wondering when you last washed the KitchenAid you used to mix it. Did you leave the eggs out too long? Were your hands clean when you opened the butter to drop it in the bowl? Was your cat milling around the utensil container before you grabbed a spoon? These are the questions I don't know the answer to and while I appreciate the gesture, I will not be consuming that questionable batch of flat cookies. Lucky for you, my kids and husband don't possess my neurotic tendencies so your gift won't go to waste. Unless it tastes like shit, then you should consider gifting us a bar of soap during the holidays. I promise it won't go to waste.