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I love traveling. There are few things I don't love about traveling and they include; the return home laundry pile, waiting in security lines at the airport and being asked if I am "a Mormon". Just try to have a conversation with someone outside of Utah and at some point the question gets asked. I never ask people from New York if they are Jewish or people with twelve kids if they are Catholic, but somehow being from Utah equals one of three things; you are Mormon, you are a polygamist, or you have horns. Didn't you know that Mormons have horns? That conversation happened back when I was a teenager traveling to the East Coast and it was a serious question from the flight attendant after she asked where I was from and where I was headed.
"Don't all Mormons have little horns on their head?"
I wish I could go back in a time machine and give her a more inappropriate answer to such an inappropriate question, but at the time, I stood with a shocked expression on my face and shook my head until she walked back to her soda cart.
While on a cruise ship last week, we were sitting in the designated smoking corner (it was the size of love seat), drinking beer and conversing with a couple squished next to us.
"From Utah, huh? You guys Mormons?"
Yep. We take a week vacation from the Word of Wisdom, tackled smoking and found a real taste for alcoholic beverages. Really? If you know nothing about the LDS culture, wait for a lead in. Anyone who is an active Mormon will be more than happy to share an hour long sermon within minutes of meeting you. As soon as they find out you are from LA or Nebraska or Florida, their concern is that you haven't had two 19 year old kids bear their testimony on your front porch while you are enjoying Saturday afternoon football and a cold brewskie. They can and will save your soul. The rest of us from Utah, we're just on vacation.
The polygamy question is a bit outdated and just as annoying. I understand that back in the late 1800's, it was a kind of big deal that Utah wanted polygamy more that it wanted statehood. I get it. But it's been a while and I think there are people in polygamous, poly-amorous, and other taboo relationships, outside of Utah. We aren't the only ones, folks. In my day to day, activities I rarely come into contact with polygamy and I have lived in Utah for 35 years. I have seen a few pligs at Starbucks on my road trips through St. George and I'm pretty sure I have seen a few of their houses in Eagle Mountain. No single family needs three 4,000 square foot homes built in a circle with a playground that puts Liberty Park to shame. We know what you're up to, folks. Otherwise, I see as many pligs and humans with horns as the rest of the world.
We aren't all Mormon. This state has many other cultures and religions that can and should represent us. We have great outdoor activities and a low cost of living. We have jobs, safe neighborhoods, National Parks and we are centrally located to many great adventures in the West. Ask me about that. I am tempted to have a shirt printed strictly for vacationing...."Made In Utah. Not a Mormon." That is trademarked, so don't even try to steal it.
I wish I could go back in a time machine and give her a more inappropriate answer to such an inappropriate question, but at the time, I stood with a shocked expression on my face and shook my head until she walked back to her soda cart.
While on a cruise ship last week, we were sitting in the designated smoking corner (it was the size of love seat), drinking beer and conversing with a couple squished next to us.
"From Utah, huh? You guys Mormons?"
Yep. We take a week vacation from the Word of Wisdom, tackled smoking and found a real taste for alcoholic beverages. Really? If you know nothing about the LDS culture, wait for a lead in. Anyone who is an active Mormon will be more than happy to share an hour long sermon within minutes of meeting you. As soon as they find out you are from LA or Nebraska or Florida, their concern is that you haven't had two 19 year old kids bear their testimony on your front porch while you are enjoying Saturday afternoon football and a cold brewskie. They can and will save your soul. The rest of us from Utah, we're just on vacation.
The polygamy question is a bit outdated and just as annoying. I understand that back in the late 1800's, it was a kind of big deal that Utah wanted polygamy more that it wanted statehood. I get it. But it's been a while and I think there are people in polygamous, poly-amorous, and other taboo relationships, outside of Utah. We aren't the only ones, folks. In my day to day, activities I rarely come into contact with polygamy and I have lived in Utah for 35 years. I have seen a few pligs at Starbucks on my road trips through St. George and I'm pretty sure I have seen a few of their houses in Eagle Mountain. No single family needs three 4,000 square foot homes built in a circle with a playground that puts Liberty Park to shame. We know what you're up to, folks. Otherwise, I see as many pligs and humans with horns as the rest of the world.
We aren't all Mormon. This state has many other cultures and religions that can and should represent us. We have great outdoor activities and a low cost of living. We have jobs, safe neighborhoods, National Parks and we are centrally located to many great adventures in the West. Ask me about that. I am tempted to have a shirt printed strictly for vacationing...."Made In Utah. Not a Mormon." That is trademarked, so don't even try to steal it.
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