Bugging Me

                                                 Yeah, this really happens.


On Tuesday, I can bitch about whatever I damn well please. Today, you will get a little insight on how I am super annoyed by certain people. If you never get annoyed by other humans and love everyone, well I have nothing to tell you except, good on ya'. That's not me. I could pretend that I love everyone or keep it to myself, but in my mind, that would be lying. We've covered how I feel about lying in previous posts. Not a big believer. I have never been good at pretending to be someone I am not. I've tried to be a quiet, coy wife and a friend who overlooks bad choices but when push comes to shove, my mouth says what my mind has been trying to keep down. It's is just my truth.
I go to the bar with my sister. My heavy drinking days are long forgotten, but as the mother of two, wife to one, employee to a few and human of this planet, I need a little alcohol sometimes. We sit at the bar, ignoring any creeper flirts and drink dark beer. We laugh and cry and question how we turned out as polar opposites with the same fucking parents. There are no answers to most of our inquiries. While enjoying our time together, there are a gaggle of girls who sit next to us and without even looking up, I want to choke a bitch out. I didn't even see these chicks and I whisper to my sister "I hate them don't I?". She peers over my shoulder and with a chuckle says "Umm, yes. They look like really young, sorority sisters who have never been to a bar before." Fact: They have a right to be there. Fact: Someone loves them. Fact: I don't love them and I don't want them next to me. All I can hear is giggling and chatter and hair flinging. They gawk at men and act stupid. By stupid, I mean idiotic. By idiotic, I mean immature, catty bitches who feel entitled. Did they tell me that? They didn't have to.
When I was serving coffee, I came into contact with many people I had a strong desire to Chuck Norris in the gut. Those special folks who complained about every drink, yelled at employees and tipped with five sticky pennies from the floor of their Mercedes. I don't care who you are, that's a dick move. I would put my happy face on and cater to their every need while seething inside and judging. Yes....judging them.
I am open to the fact that I am the only person on the planet who feels this way, and more likely the only one who is dumb enough to write it in a blog. That is possible. I am also open to the fact that we should love everyone and never judge. What I really think however, is that we all do this in our own mind and try really hard to make sure no one knows it. People judge me, they would be forced to. I wear holey stretch pants to my son's class for reading hour, have no fashion sense and curse in my backyard while picking up dog shit. The picture above is a great example of how I show up to my kids' school on a daily basis. I am mouthy, insecure, inappropriate and judgemental. I am not perfect. Judge away. It takes nothing away from the awesome things I can be or who most of us are when other people are busy judging. Does my insecurity make me mean? Maybe. I think we all have a lot to be proud of in our lives and a lot to work on. Just like judging, it is human nature.