Yes, I Hate That Too.

Fuck That Shit Friday is quite possibly my favorite day to blog. My mind starts reeling the moment I wake up and I have so many things to write about. Instead of picking one today, I will give you a sweet little list of my biggest pet peeves. Perhaps I will expand on some of these one day, perhaps not. Until I decide, here's to you, Friday.

Fuck This Shit:

1. People who constantly break for no reason on the freeway. I'm talking to you, old lady.
2. People who stand too close to me. Anywhere. I don't need you breathing down my fucking neck in the buffet line/grocery store/bus stop.
3. Finding the perfect piece of clothing online, deciding to buy it and finding out that it comes in every size but mine.
4. Getting to the checkout line and realizing some asshole poked a hole in the bag of sugar I grabbed. I'm not going back for another one and now my coffee will taste like shit.
5. The sound of crumpling grocery bags.
6. Leg hair.
7. Shaving above mentioned leg hair with soap because my kids used all the shaving cream to make creations in the tub.
8. Strangers that touch me. If I don't go in for a handshake or a hug, please assume I want nothing to do with you. Ever.
9. Receipts. I need extra paper in my purse like I need a hole in the head.
10. Needing to explain my smoking. If I don't do it around you, what the fuck do you care?
11. Workout pants that don't have a smooth crotch but instead have the largest seam known to man. Vaginal chaffing sends me into a fit.
12. Putting in contacts.
13. Flat pillows.
14. That awkward moment I take off my sandals and my feet smell like corn chips.
15. Getting a sunburn on my forehead. Since it's the size of a drive in movie screen, it creates problems when you are viewing the rest of my face.
16. Running into people from high school. There are only a handful of people I liked and I never seem to run into them.
17. Pretending to like people. No one ever believes it, so I don't know why I try.
18. Shitty service at a restaurant. I'm really glad I dropped 70 bucks so I could be ignored for an hour.
19. Slow walkers. This covers most people I know. I just keep going and figure at some point they will catch up. Or they won't.
20. Getting old. I haven't found one part of my aging body that I think is super attractive but I will let you know if it happens.